在无数学生争相竞逐的藤校申请中，哈佛大学始终以其极高的录取门槛和评审标准著称。但真正能让申请者从成千上万名学霸中脱颖而出的，往往并不是完美的GPA或标化考试成绩，而是一篇写出了“你是谁”的文书。
最近，哈佛官方校报 The Harvard Crimson 公布了十篇成功申请者的优秀文书范例。他们的故事，并不总是惊天动地，却真实动人 —— 有人用一双亮黄色的 Crocs 讲述领导力的觉醒，有人从厨房里的牛肉粉写到家庭与文化的根基。每一篇文章，都是一位青少年在与世界对话的开始，在纸上描摹“我是谁”，也在展现什么才是真正的“与众不同”。
老师今天就带大家走进这些文字，一起看看什么样的故事能走进哈佛招生官的心！
1、Carrie's Essay
I am a builder. No. I am a seasoned architect. My tools are foreign to the realities of others but mundane by my standards. I don't compose the perplexing and unique structures that most think of when the word architect is mentioned. Matter of fact, I don't make structures at all; my mastery is in the assembly of walls. Mental ones, to be exact. I am a skillful artist of intricately woven walls to create a complex maze for the others that try to get to know me; they are left confused, with no choice but to surrender their arbitrary efforts to “save” me.
I was unmatched in my array of skills. That was until I met Mark. Mark was a worker from my first mental hospital visits who had attached himself to my conscience before I could push him away as I had done with so many others. With an equally impressive skill set, he was able to navigate his way through my long-standing labyrinth to its center. That’s where he found me. Still crouched next to my fledgling wall, dirt on my knees with dust on my face, I had finally been figured out for the first time in years. How did he get here? When did I let my guard down? The answers to these questions sat obnoxiously in front of me. The game that we always played. Horse. Such a benign game, that the thought of it having any significant part in my life is utterly incomprehensible. But it did, nonetheless.
Little did I know that Mark was studying to become a therapist in his studies of psychology, and I, his first patient. This is not a story of teenage love and life-changing heartbreak, but of one where an abandoned kid whose father raped her and whose mother gave up custody to have the father’s perverted approval, finally gets the parental figure that she was never offered before. I was an emotional wreck at this time, not wanting to live, much less fight a court battle to get the “justice” everyone so badly wanted for me. So Mark, the father I never got to have, taught me how to swim in the never-ending circumstances I was drowning in. With every swish of the net of our game, a new way he would teach my fumbling feet to move in the water. And with every finished game, he was one wall closer to the reality behind my facade. He taught me that being angry at my circumstances would not fix them or get me any closer to overcoming them.
Nothing is going to change my mom's decision. Nothing is going to turn back time and change what my dad did. I can be the ruler of the lonely maze I created, or I can be surrounded by people who love and care for me. It wasn't easy destroying all the walls I had taken years to build and perfect, but it wasn't impossible either. This isn't a fairytale where Mark waved a magic wand and all was better and my walls disappeared from my mind. This is reality, and it took time, patience, and effort to unassemble my walls. Brick by painstaking brick. But in the actual world, people don't get happily ever after. Some of my walls are still there. And that's okay. I have learned to recognize my progress instead of singling out my flaws.
I am finally okay with not being perfect. My walls have chips and cracks, but I am content with their creation and their destruction. The destruction of familiarity is a beautiful thing. And so I climb out of the water, let the flowers bloom in the cracks of my walls, and walk off the court arm in arm with someone who sees me for who I am, not whom I pretend to be.
点评
这篇文书既展现了叙事技巧，又体现了情感洞察力。文中将筑造心灵围墙与构建迷宫的精妙隐喻交织其间，形成一套复杂却易于理解的象征体系，生动刻画了作者的情感困境与治愈历程。选择书写这段深刻创伤经历，既彰显了学生的勇气、脆弱与韧性，也让读者得以窥见此事对其人生的深远影响。与此同时，学生明确表示这段经历并不能定义她的全部人格。
通过反思自己如何积极面对并超越创伤，文中展现出非凡的坦诚与成熟 —— 尽管曾是受害者，学生却从未以受害者姿态自居。当文末指出追求完美并非目标，成长才是真谛时，字里行间流露的谦逊与力量令人动容。作为读者，你从开篇就会被深深吸引；这种引人入胜又细腻深刻的文字，正是学生高度自省力的最佳证明。
2、Alexander's Essay
The mouthwatering scent of beef broth brought back a flood of childhood memories as it wafted around me. After a 12-hour drive from Florida to Texas, the familiar smell meant I was in 'bep cua bà', or 'grandma's kitchen' in Vietnamese. Every summer when my family visited my grandparents' house, my grandma always had a steaming pot of pho ready for us when we arrived, and this time was no exception. For my family, pho was more than a Vietnamese delicacy: it symbolized bringing us together over a warm, hearty meal. This specific visit, however, came with a change of perspective; as a young adult who was now conscious of his cultural roots, I wanted to learn more about my heritage by learning how to cook pho from my grandma.
As she boiled the water, my grandma stressed to me, 'Every bowl of pho needs a strong foundation: the broth.' Without a good broth, she explained, none of the other ingredients mattered. As I stood over the boiling pot, I thought about my own foundation: my family. My parents immigrated to America after the Vietnam War with nothing and had to work tirelessly to accomplish the celebrated 'American Dream'. From taking me to a 7 am student government fundraiser or a 10 pm baseball game in a city five hours away, I would not have been able to participate in these activities, which I consider an integral part of my identity, without their support. Being fortunate enough to have a strong foundation in my life has allowed me to be a strong foundation for others. For example, as an upperclassman on my varsity baseball team, I strive to be available for my teammates. Last season, when a younger teammate was struggling in a few games, I stayed back after practice to work with him on his fielding before driving him home, even though he lived almost an hour away. This small gesture was a reflection of my attempt to build a strong foundation for others.
As I watched the broth simmer in a giant pot that my grandma had continuously stirred for two days, she imparted another bit of wisdom onto me: making a great bowl of pho was also all about balance. Simply taking a great broth and indiscriminately adding to it would not suffice; each of the ingredients had to be in perfect balance with each other. Balance was never really something I considered until recently, when I experienced the struggle that can come from its absence. When I suffered a stress fracture in my lower back a few years ago that left me unable to play baseball for the foreseeable future, I felt as if suddenly a major part of my identity had been stripped away. I struggled with this new reality for a while until I realized I could fill this temporary void by acting as a mentor for my younger teammates. Additionally, with my newfound spare time, I was able to further develop my interest in Mu Alpha Theta, which gave me a new, enriching opportunity to compete in mathematics competitions. By the time I was finally cleared to play, I had developed a fresh appreciation for the importance of maintaining a balance among all the activities I did, as I had experienced firsthand the empty feeling of having this balance stripped away.
While putting the finishing scallions in the bowl, I reflected on the delectable meal I helped create and realized that what had started out as me simply wanting to learn more about my heritage became something more poignant: an introspection. Although there may not be a single perfect recipe for pho, by applying my grandma's cooking principles in my everyday life, whether it be in baseball, my volunteer lab experience, or my service trip to Guatemala, I hope to be able to make a 'bowl of pho' that is perfect for me.
点评
Alexander的这篇文章是一篇充满思考与情感共鸣的反思之作，围绕身份认同、家庭与个人成长展开。他以越南牛肉粉（pho）的烹饪过程为核心比喻，巧妙地将自己的越南文化背景与“根基”“平衡”“坚韧”等更广泛的主题连接起来。“bếp của bà（祖母的厨房）”这一意象带来了温暖和细节感，使整篇叙述深深扎根于具有意义的文化语境中。
最令人印象深刻的是，Alexander能够将个人经历升华为具有普遍意义的洞察。他面对逆境的回应——在运动受伤后指导队友、重新找回对数学的热情——展现了内敛的领导力与适应能力。这些片段真实可信，展现了他的价值观在生活中的具体体现。
文章结构上，从“熬汤”到“平衡”再到“内省”，主题脉络清晰，层层递进，内涵丰富。不过，部分段落之间的过渡仍可更流畅，有些语句略显重复或抽象。结尾虽然情感真挚，但如果能用一个更具体的个人画面收尾，而不是“完美一碗面”的抽象比喻，或许能留下更深刻的印象。
总体而言，这是一篇真诚而引人入胜的文书，展现了学生的深度与品格。若在表达的清晰度和节奏上做些微调则更好了。
3、Barry's Essay
I woke up one morning to the usual noise in the kitchen. “That plate of porridge is mine,” my brother yelled outrageously at my sister, “leave it or else I will beat you up.” Food scrambles and fights were order of the day in the family I was raised. The size of one's meal would be determined by one's age. You had to fight for food at times, or else hunger would eat you alive. Living with ten siblings in a polygamous family is not the definition of tranquility. However, I have learned more from this revolving door than I could have been taught in solitary silence. Beyond chaos, there is a whisper that teaches the benefits of unselfish concern.
My mother was a teacher, but her salary could not sustain the big family. Almost every day, she would wake up early in the morning before work and go to the fields. My parents were shadowy figures whose voices I heard vaguely in the morning when sleep was shallow, and whom I glimpsed with irresistibly heavy eye-lids as they trudged wearily into the house at night. We sat together as a whole family on special occasions. After a bumper harvest, my parents would sell their crops in the neighborhood. I vividly remember my mother counting proceeds from the crop sale, her dark face grim, and I think now, beautiful. Not with the hollow beauty of well-simulated features, but with a strong radiance of one who has suffered and never yielded. “This is for your school fees arrears,” she would murmur making a little pile. “This is for the groceries that we borrowed from Mr Kibe’s store,” and so on. The list was endless. We would survive at least for the present.
My father instilled in me the importance of education. I would see the value of education every time I shook hands with him; the scratches and calluses from the field in his hands were enough motivation. After every award I received, he would firmly shake my hands as a sign of profound pride. My tacit prayer was to ease his pain one day. Unfortunately this was never to come true, he died on 5 February 2016 in a car accident, only a week before I received my IGCSE O LEVEL results and I had attained 14 straight A grades, standing out to be one of the top performers in the country. After my father’s death, his brothers took everything that he had acquired.
Inevitably, circumstances forced me to take a break from school in January 2017 and bear my share of the eternal burden at home. I had to take care of my mother whose health was deteriorating. I would spend the day doing household chores, and the nights were times of intensive study. It was on my mother's deathbed when I was fully convinced that she was a seasoned fighter. “Barry,” she called me, “I am not going to die till you finish school.” In order not to disillusion that extraordinary faith in her voice, I assured her that she was going to live. Unfortunately, she succumbed to death on the 15th of March 2017. I “died” with her. My belief in the God she had ardently prayed to till the time of her demise was shaken.
Already laid waste by poverty and pain, I went back to school through the generosity of strangers. School became a battleground for victory. I came back to life determined than ever before. I out-performed the country boys who mocked my struggle. I went on to win accolades in the National and Regional Mathematics Olympiads and was awarded the Higher Life Foundation Scholarship that was going to pay my fees throughout high school.
Today, I am an epitome of a black, double-orphaned, African boy who lost everything he ever valued, but refused to give up on his dream.
点评
Barry 的这篇文章讲述了他在一个十几口人的非洲大家庭中成长的故事，乍看之下，它确实具备几种“草稿未打磨”的典型特征：比如像 “my brother yelled outrageously” 这样的非地道表达（英语母语者或许更倾向说 “yelled in outrage”）；又或者像 “I came back to life determined than ever before” 这句中，Google Docs 会毫不留情地在 “than” 下划出蓝色波浪线，提醒作者补上被省略的 “more”。
但这样的批评忽略了这篇文章真正非凡之处：精准的细节捕捉、细腻的情感层次，以及诗意的语言表达能力。大多数学生在段落开头引出主题句后，会在“我从这个（喧闹的家庭）中学到的，比独自沉默中学到的还要多”这类话上戛然而止，心满意足地交代完主旨。但Barry明白，最有说服力的写作，往往是在清晰的基础上，搭建出能触动读者情感的表达结构，而不是停留在表层的总结。那句紧随主旨句后所补充的那句优雅尾声“在混乱之中，有一个低语教我懂得无私关怀的可贵”极具感染力，那在混乱家庭生活中传来的智慧低语也许正是Barry自己内心的回声。
幸运的是，Barry文章的其余部分，丝毫不逊于开头的精彩。不论是他用冷静克制的笔触告诉我们父亲去世的消息（这种平静反而比最撕心裂肺的哀嚎更令人感到沉痛），还是他在描写母亲计算家庭开销的平凡瞬间时，忽然停顿下来感叹母亲容颜的美丽，我们始终能与他的思维共鸣、感受到他的在场感 ——即便是在电脑屏幕之上，他的思想印记依然清晰可辨。
4、Claire's Essay
Of the memorable moments in my life when I have discovered one of my passions, almost all of them involve my bright yellow Crocs. Buying rubber shoes in such a conspicuous color was not a spontaneous decision; it took me two months to choose. I had been stalking crocs.com, clicking between the color options, and asking for the unsatisfying opinions of friends before what felt like my rom-com “meet cute” moment: a girl wearing a black tracksuit walked past me in Crocs the brightest shade of yellow I had ever seen. That very week, I opened my laptop and decisively purchased a size 8 pair of “Lemon” Crocs. Ten business days (and two months to build up the courage to wear my eye-catching kicks out in public) later, my self-discovery began.
I was wearing my Crocs when I recognized the importance of activism in young communities. This revelation came on a Saturday in March 2018. I took a 25-minute train ride down to Washington D.C. to participate in the March for Our Lives rally—my first protest. For all 25 anxiety-inducing minutes, my heart raced and my muscles tightened as I tried to ignore the probing stares from strangers wondering why I decided to pair yellow shoes with a green coat.
But my fears (both Croc and non-Croc related) quickly dissolved as I stood alongside activists that were my age; in front of a stage dominated by leaders that were my age; making me realize that the only thing stopping me from being a student activist, at my age, was effort. The young voices calling for change inspired me to step into my responsibility to use my voice to help those whose voices are being suppressed. I stood there for one hour, but what I saw was enough to encourage me to actualize my vision for a world where students are driven to engender social change through service. So, five months later, I co-founded The Virago Project (TVP), a student-led organization focused on building a community of activists like the ones I stood alongside in March. A “virago” is a woman displaying exemplary qualities, but the term has been twisted to demean assertive women. From its name to its activities, TVP is about redefining leadership.
After my day in D.C., I wore my Crocs to every student meeting TVP held. I wore them as we sold 150 handmade bracelets to raise funds for a local children's home and again when we posted colorful cards with encouraging messages all over my high school. Walking into rooms full of ambitious student leaders using TVP as a jumping-off point for their own service projects, I beamed as their gaze met my sunny shoes and then shot up to my equally cheery smile.
“Dunni, why do you wear such noticeable shoes when you lead these meetings?” asked one of our activists.
Pleasantly dumbfounded, I could only respond with a curious smile—it's not often that frivolous items lead to unintentionally philosophical inquiries. So, I held my tongue until the answer struck on a late-night in November 2019.
I wear such noticeable shoes when I stand in front of other student leaders because I want to model the kind of leadership that is as smile-inducing, deliberate, and visible as my Crocs. TVP has trained me to be, above all, altruistic, and I love that I get to learn and model this with a generation of world changers. It took me two months to decide I wanted a pair of sun-colored shoes but only two seconds and a model to realize that I desired the option I'd once overlooked. Now, I realize that, to curious strangers, I am the girl walking past in Crocs the brightest shade of yellow they have ever seen. And I am delighted with the thought that I could be the one to break someone's cycle of indecision and social apathy.
点评
这篇文章堪称叙事真实感与有意识讲述的范本——这两者正是优秀文书的标志。在自信又自然的语气中，作者用一双出人意料的亮黄色 Crocs（洞洞鞋）作为象征，引出了对身份认同、领导力与社会影响力的深刻探讨。一则看似轻松的小故事，最终升华为关于“可见性”、“发声”与“人生使命”的深度思考。
真正让这篇文章脱颖而出的是：它能够将个人经历与政治意识相连，却毫不刻意或生硬。作者并不仅仅是在讲述自己的行动主义经历，更在展现一个瞬间如何催生出她对于领导力的全新理解 —— 一种快乐的、包容的、自觉的领导方式。Virago Project 不是她简历上的一个条目，而是她亲身经历自然延伸的成果，文章通过鲜明的意象与深刻的内省将其生动呈现。
不要忘记招生官每天可能会阅读几十篇申请文书，他们真正寻找的是那些耳目一新、具体鲜活、情感真实的文字。这篇文书之所以成功，是因为它在开头就牢牢吸引读者，用节奏感与幽默感维持注意力，同时巧妙地融入了一系列顶级品质：主动性、社会意识，以及情绪智慧。
写出令人难忘的文书，并不需要改变世界的大事件，而需要清晰的思考、自我反省，以及一个有吸引力的切入视角。而这篇文章，三者兼具。它坦诚但不矫情，雄心勃勃却不用力过猛。最重要的是，它塑造了这样一个申请者形象：有勇气“被看见”，不论是穿着亮黄色的 Crocs 还是以其他方式——而正是这种自信而独特的表达，打动了招生官。
5、Isabelle's Essay
Breakfast after church is a Sunday staple in my family. We're not allowed to eat beforehand, so right after Mass ends, my sister and I race to the bagel shop only to inevitably wait in a long line. Often when we reached the cashier, we'd find they were out of plain bagels. It was a perennially difficult decision: pick from an assortment of non-plain bagels, or wait another 20 minutes for new plain bagels.
People's bagel choices tell you everything about them, and I was a plain bagel girl through and through. Even when faced with 20 extra minutes of hunger, I decided to leave the sweet bagels for the adventurous, the savory for the straightforward, and the “everything” for the indecisive. I came for plain bagels, and I would get them, no matter the wait.
After a long wait, the warmth of the freshly-baked plain bagels radiating through the paper bag assured me my patience was worth it. Being a plain bagel girl means knowing exactly what you want—no more, no less. It means that I'm in control of my decision-making and always end up satisfied.
In senior year, my teacher graciously brought bagels to our class. Upon approaching the bag, however, I found there were no plain bagels left. Instinctively, I retreated. But my teacher stopped me and advised that I break from my comfort zone. Reluctantly, I chose an egg bagel, preferring its odd yellow shade to the surrounding sweeter variety (who wants a french toast bagel anyway?). My first bite introduced me to a new world: this sweet and savory egg bagel flawlessly balanced the worlds of the adventurous and the straightforward.
My willingness to try an egg bagel didn't lead to a phase of food experimentation, but it did make me see that I could be more spontaneous than my plain bagel self might allow.
Before high school, you could never spot me on a dance floor; I much preferred to watch from the audience. But in my freshman year, I joined the dance department of my school's annual production of S!NG on a whim.
As soon as I tried the first move, I knew the decision was worth it. I enjoyed diligently practicing routines and adding my own flair, satisfying my tendency to prepare thoroughly while also fulfilling my desire to explore the realm of dance. Eventually, I excelled so much that the directors chose me as their successor—a position that has strengthened me as a dancer, leader, and person. Though I relished my newfound sense of spontaneity, my plain bagel girl roots helped me to effectively manage others' dancing. I tirelessly choreographed and re-choreographed each step and count of a routine, no matter how long the detailed revisions took. During practices, I analyzed the dancers' movements and refined them to what could only be described as plain bagel perfection.
Sometimes the moments when I thought I needed to be in control to be successful were when I needed to be more spontaneous. In my first year being director, I was unfamiliar with managing a multitude of variously skilled dancers. Shedding my fear of being an inexperienced leader was difficult, but I soon learned to open myself to others' advice about describing moves and maintaining the beat. Together, through sometimes spontaneous practice sessions and spurts of inspiration, we worked to adapt the choreography to accomodate all dancers.
I revel in the contradiction that is my simultaneous meticulousness and spontaneity: my egg bagel epiphany. I can count on myself to prepare thoroughly to optimize my potential, no matter how long it takes. But I can also trust myself to make the most of the unknown and stay true to myself while doing so. It's what makes me multidimensional; it makes me a young woman no longer defined by her bagel choices but rather by her versatility and what she can do with it.
点评
一篇出色的文书，往往源于意想不到的创意切入与少见的自我觉察。Isabelle的文章恰到好处地诠释了这一点，仅凭一句话就令人眼前一亮：“一个人喜欢什么口味的贝果，能说明他们的一切，而我一直是个原味贝果女孩。”
将性格偏好凝缩为对贝果的选择，这种轻松俏皮的比喻，不仅勾起了读者的好奇心，也让我们更深入地理解Isabelle对“稳定与掌控”的执着。而当一块完美的鸡蛋贝果意外打破她一贯坚持的“原味”原则时，她开始重新审视：一味拒绝即兴和变化，是否也意味着错过了人生中的某些可能性？一次心血来潮加入校内舞蹈演出，她在排练与表演中探索出了一种全新的节奏感——一种既顺应规律，又敢于跳脱规则的自由。而当她最终成为整个项目的负责人，她便借助这段“贝果启示”去调和自己的完美主义与真机构导力所需的灵活性。
Isabelle 的故事展现了一个不断成长的自我认知，而这正是她实现理想目标的关键素质。她用灵动的笔触，从日常琐事中挖掘出深意。“我决定把甜味贝果留给爱冒险的人，把咸味留给踏实的人，把‘全口味’留给拿不定主意的人。”她对这些味道背后的解读，既真实又独特，让人看到一个在纸面成绩与活动履历之外，鲜活而多面的她。
更多优秀文书范例，请参考：https://www.business.thecrimson.com/10-successful-harvard-essays-2025
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