CMU PS范文
今天给大家分享一篇来自卡内基梅隆大学的PS范文，大家写文书时，与其“粉饰过往”，不如真实拆解
创伤与否定
You are 7 years old. A girl you are trying to befriend tells you that she does not want to be friends with you because your eyes are “ugly and squinty.” Hot tears run down your face because you do not understand the reason for her ugly words.
你 7 岁。一个你想交朋友的女孩告诉你，她不想和你做朋友，因为你的眼睛 "又丑又斜"。你的热泪流了下来，因为你不明白她说这些难听的话的原因。
You are 13 years old. It is Halloween and on Instagram you see two of your classmates dress up as Asians. Their faces are painted yellow and their eyes are pulled back with tape. The caption reads, “can’t find the dogs to eat with our eye slits!” People ask if you are offended. You do not want to be seen as uptight so you laugh it off. Numerous incidents like these dot your childhood. You do not want to be Asian anymore. You hate your hideous Asian face.
你今年 13 岁。今天是万圣节，你在 Instagram 上看到两个同学打扮成亚洲人。他们的脸被涂成了黄色，眼睛用胶带往后拉。标题写着："我们的眼缝找不到狗吃！"人们问你是否感到不快。你不想让人觉得你拘谨，所以一笑置之。无数类似的事件点缀着你的童年。你不想再做亚洲人了。你讨厌自己丑陋的亚洲面孔。
I had always been shy as a kid and the environment I was raised in only exacerbated my growing insecurities. My school’s population was 99% white, so I had no friends of my own ethnicity and often faced the brunt of people’s ignorance. In middle school, everyone suddenly started caring about looks. I wanted so badly to look like my Caucasian classmates and worked tirelessly to try to erase my “Asian” features. I bleached my hair and skin. I glued my eyelids into double folds and wore eye-enlarging contacts. I spent countless hours researching plastic surgeons that could “Westernize” my looks. I was utterly obsessed with how others perceived me. My insecurities were loud, and they attracted unwanted attention from other students who bullied me.
我从小就很害羞，而我的成长环境只会加剧我日益增长的不安全感。我所在的学校99%的学生都是白人，所以我没有同种族的朋友，经常遭受别人的无知。到了初中，大家突然开始关心我的长相。我非常想让自己看起来像白种同学，于是不懈地努力抹去自己的 "亚洲 "特征。我漂白了头发和皮肤。我把眼皮粘成了双眼皮，戴上了增大眼睛的隐形眼镜。我花了无数个小时研究能让我的外貌 "西方化 "的整形外科医生。我完全沉迷于别人对我的看法。我的不安全感很强烈，引起了其他同学不必要的注意，他们欺负我。
转折与连接
At this point I lacked friends in real life and began to find solace on the internet, my getaway from the burdens of real life. People could not judge me based on how I looked, only by my words. I was playing an online game where I met my first Asian friend, Ethan. He had a pride in his ethnicity I never had. After getting to know me better, Ethan asked why I tried so hard to reject my heritage. He wanted to know why I never showed my face. Over time, on the internet, I started to meet more people of my ethnicity who became my role models and cherished friends.
此时，我在现实生活中缺少朋友，开始在互联网上寻找慰藉，这是我摆脱现实生活重负的地方。人们无法根据我的外表来判断我，只能通过我的言语。在玩一款网络游戏时，我认识了我的第一个亚洲朋友伊桑。他对自己的种族有着我从未有过的自豪感。在进一步了解我之后，伊桑问我为什么这么努力地拒绝自己的血统。他想知道我为什么从不露面。随着时间的推移，我开始在互联网上结识更多的同族人，他们成为了我的榜样和珍视的朋友。
自我理解
After constant reflection and studying psychology, I began to understand my past in a new light. The ignorant people who ridiculed me faced stress and insecurity in their own lives that spurred their actions. Thereafter, I was able to come to the realization that has since then freed me of my insecurities: every person who passes by me is living a life just as vivid and complex as my own, with their own thoughts and perceptions; everyone has their own image of me in their head, and because none are a fully correct representation of who I am, I should not be concerned with trying to modify them. And what I learned from the hours I resided immersed on the internet was that what defines me is not my looks, but what I have to say. My life was not mine if I cared constantly about what others thought.
经过不断反思和学习心理学，我开始从新的角度理解自己的过去。那些嘲笑我的无知的人面临着自己生活中的压力和不安全感，这些压力和不安全感刺激了他们的行为。此后，我终于明白了一个让我摆脱了不安全感的道理：每一个从我身边经过的人，都和我一样过着生动而复杂的生活，他们有自己的想法和认识；每个人的脑海中都有自己的我的形象，因为没有一个是完全正确的我，所以我不应该在意去修饰他们。我在互联网上沉浸了几个小时，从中学到的是，定义我的不是我的外表，而是我要说的话。如果我总是在意别人的看法，我的生活就不是我自己的。
重建与认同
The internet was my catalyst for change, and slowly, I started to blossom. Fear of judgement had once stopped me from seeking opportunities, and I sought to change that. I began to branch out and engage with new people. My makeup was no longer a mask, but instead a tool I used to enhance the features that I now love. I am proud of my unique features and refuse to let anyone make me feel the way I used to feel. Though I will never be able to erase the scarred little girl from my past, I would not want to because she has made me strong from what she endured. I want to be Asian.
互联网是我改变的催化剂，慢慢地，我开始绽放光芒。惧怕评判曾一度阻止我寻找机会，而我试图改变这种状况。我开始走出去，与新朋友接触。我的妆容不再是面具，而是我用来增强我现在喜爱的特征的工具。我为自己独特的五官感到骄傲，并拒绝任何人让我有过去那种感觉。虽然我永远无法抹去过去那个伤痕累累的小女孩，但我也不想抹去，因为她的经历让我变得坚强。我想成为亚洲人。
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